IS TOILET PAPER BETTER THAN WATER?
In the 18 years I've lived hear, I've seen and experienced just about everything. Once in a while, I'll get a surprise but for the most part, what was racy in the past is today's norm. In the two years since I started this blog and making YouTube videos, I've heard things I thought I'd never hear.
Of course, I've heard the usual my girlfriend is a ho, will it work questions too many times to count, but when Daniel wrote me in, I was admittedly a little shocked. It's not ever day that someone writes me in asking questions about how Thais (and Cambodians) properly clean their nether regions. Is this what I've become? An amalgamation of Jerry Springer, Morton Downey, Dr. Phil of Thailand? Thinking about this makes me feel like some Spanish chick from West Side Story crying out, "Please no let it be so, please no let it be so!"
Really? Is this what I've evolved into? A guy telling people how to clean their ass properly so they're left with a squeaky clean bung hole?
Toilet paper is disgusting. Seriously. Clean your ass with water for a week and you'll never want to reach for the Charmin again. If water is soothing, paper is inflammatory.
What made me do a video debating the merits of toilet paper and the bum gun? Once this guy mentioned he was worried his girl have a funky rear exit, I started thinking. Doesn't he know? How can he not know?
It turns out the guy had a bad experience with a vagina and his face no longer gets anywhere ever near the Hershey Highway. Comedian Redd Foxx used to remind his audience that the nose is just an inch away. In Daniel's case, his nose is about three feet away meaning he has yet to perform the sniff test. Most Asian women tend to be extremely clean down there, so he probably need not worry, but...if it were me, I'd certainly want to be certain nothing was going on at the back entrance before I called her my girlfriend.
Oh, did I mention I'll take washing it over wiping it ANY DAY?
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